A data analyst and an engineer, undertaking the incredible burden of reviewing movies, music, beer and cultural phenomena in the basest ways possible.
Grammar, political correctness, your feelings, and solipsistic onanism are of no concern to us.
Though similar in some respects, we are wildly divergent creatures, which will make for some interesting observations. Doomriders are the tie that binds us.
Due to the inherently subjective nature of our opinions - nay, JUDGEMENTS - we find no use for the standard ordinal scale. Instead, we will be using several metrics, whose inner-workings are a mystery, even to us. Take for instance, the patented "swoll-o-meter." This ranks how amped an album gets you to lift weights and drink beer in your underwear. A rating of "full on doomriders" would indicate that you can really, really get swoll to this music. On the other end of the spectrum would be "deep fried burritos" aka "chimichangas" which can be awesome on their own merits, but cause you to barely be able to lift yourself off the couch, let alone pound some brews and rip out a few sets. Then there are some bands better suited for the "getting-drunk-on-whisky-and-tea-while-reading-the-new-yorker-0-meter" which is still under beta testing. And no, we will not call "whisky and tea" a "hot toddie." Who the fuck is todd? And whats with the cutesy nickname?
Confused? Don't be. All will be revealed with time.
This will most likely occupy our attention for a fortnight or two, so enjoy it while it lasts. Or don't. Fuck it.
